Saturday, March 12, 2011

Suffering and Crisis...A response

I know now that the suffering and trauma I have endured has made me who I really am. I know now that I may not be as open to learning, empathy, growth and life had I not gone through the many challenges. For years I hid the pain, scars and broken pieces of myself that were being held together by what seemed like old elmers glue that had dried out. I was rigid holding the pieces together by pure will but when the one small piece fell the entire facade shattered and I am forever thankful. Now I am living and experiencing life like I never have. A friend asked me a couple of days ago what it felt like to be amongst the living again and I responded that it wasn't again because I am in a place I've never been.

I used to be ashamed of my crisis's and suffering. Afraid if people knew they would look at me as damaged. I thought that those things defined who I am but I'm thankful for my breakdown and breakthrough. Never has life been so rich, so good, so real.